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Self esteem is the ability to see oneself as capable and competent, loving, unique and valuable, Berne and Savary.
Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t — you’re right, Henry Ford.
Do not limit your potential, instead choose to challenge your limits, raise above your circumstances, and achieve your goals! If you are really unhappy about your job/career, try to find a better one. If you don’t have the right qualifications or experience, what are you waiting for?
Study and get your Bachelor’s degree, Master’s degree, Ph.D., or diploma. Learn a new skill, language, instrument, craft or whatever tickles your fancy. Develop and enhance your existing skill set. Prepare yourself for new opportunities; try something new, completely different, out of your comfort zone. Embrace the struggle. Explore what you would need to do in order to reinvent yourself.
Challenge yourself. You deserve it! Think Big and act boldly. You can and you will! Others have done it, so can you!
If you have negative thoughts about yourself (I’m not very attractive, I am not able to overcome this situation, I always screw things up, I’m so clumsy, etc.), ponder these things:
- Challenge these ideas: Who says what? Where is the evidence?
- Replace those negative thoughts with more constructive ones: I’m not very handsome, nor do I have a great body, but I have my own charm; I’m not a top model, but I’m not ugly; I’m a bit overweight, but I do the best I can to stay in shape and watch what I eat; if I just work hard enough and I’m patient, I can overcome any obstacle that comes my way, any challenge. I really put my foot in my mouth, but I will do my best to listen first and talk later. I am not as smart as Einstein, but I learn new things every single day.
- Tell yourself positive things daily. Visualize yourself doing well, see yourself being and having what you want. For example, imagine yourself delivering a speech, and your voice is loud and clear.
- You should be your best friend. If you think that you will not pass an important exam, sure enough, you will fail it. In other words, your external results are affected by your thoughts. Do not sabotage yourself. What you think and say has a huge impact, it has the power to change or reconstruct reality. Be sure that you think and speak well about yourself, about your true potential, and bright future. However, we must avoid proud boasting and arrogant bragging.
- Accept yourself, your appearance, body, and past. Learn to love yourself. You are worth it! You are worth far more than you could possibly imagine. Stop counting and becoming bitter with your flaws, mistakes, and setbacks. This will lead you nowhere. Beware of self-fulfilling prophecies. For example, if you think you’re no good at studying, you will end up having poor academic performance. If you are constantly thinking and saying to yourself and others that you don’t have the willpower to change your diet and get some exercise, you will not be able to accomplish your goals. On the contrary, chances are, you will quit and procrastinate. You will become sad, anxious, sensitive to comments, etc. which in turn, leads to eating food for comfort which is very counterproductive.
- Love and accept yourself as you are and focus on: your achievements; your strengths; your positive attitude towards the future; what you have learned from past experiences, mistakes, and struggles; strategies and tasks to achieve desired outcomes; how to grow and succeed in tough environments, etc. Think about them, talk about them.
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